Beginning of sleeve. Done at Tattoo Blues, Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Source: fuckyeahtattoos
SO I HAVE TO SAY, SEEING PEOPLE’S POSTS ABOUT 2011 MAKES ME WONDER WHY MY YEAR WASN’T AS PERFECT AS THEIRS. WHAT IS IT THAT I’VE DONE WRONG TO THIS WORLD THAT MADE ME ALMOST DIE, LOSE PEOPLE, DESERT MY HOME? A HOME WHERE I GET BEATEN BY MY DAD, LAUGHED AT BY BOTH OF MY PARENTS, NAME CALLING AND ENDLESS TEARS. AND YET I STILL DON’T HAVE THE STRENGTH TO LEAVE THIS “HOME”. I STARTED 2012 WITH A FEW HAPPY MOMENTS, BUT THEY WERE FAKE. FAKE HAPPY MOMENTS WHICH CAME TO AN END WITH MY TEARS. DAD CAUGHT ME IN THE STREET ONCE AGAIN, JUST AS I WAS ABOUT TO ENTER MY “HOME”, AND I GOT TO BE STRANGLED AGAIN. THIS IS HOW MY 2012 STARTED. SO TELL ME WHY I SHOULD EXPECT A GOOD YEAR?
AND NOW DON’T EVEN BOTHER TELLING ME I CAN GET HELP. BELIEVE ME, I’VE TRIED MORE THAN I CAN HANDLE. 2011 MEANT COUNTLESS HOSPITAL TRIPS, SPONTANEOUS AMBULANCE RIDES, CUTS, BLOOD, EMERGENCY DEPARTMENTS. I EVEN LEFT THE COUNTRY TO GET HELP. NOTHING HAS CHANGED, I’M STILL HERE WITH MY CLOSE FRIENDS I CALL MY TEARS, THEY’RE THE ONLY ONES WHO WRAP MY FACE WHEN I FEEL SO ALONE AND HELPLESS. THEY PROVE ME RIGHT, THAT THIS CAN NEVER BE CHANGED. THEY’RE THE ONLY ONES WHO FEEL MY GOOSEBUMPS, WASHING THEM AWAY.
I DON’T DESERVE A GOOD LIFE, A HAPPY LIFE. AS YEARS GO BY, THEY BECOME EVEN HARDER TO HANDLE. I DON’T EXPECT THIS NEW YEAR TO IMPROVE. I ALREADY KNOW HOW IT BEGAN FOR ME, I CAN PREDICT HOW IT ENDS. I TRIED TO PUT AN END TO IT, BUT I COULDN’T GET THERE. I THOUGHT MAYBE I’LL COME BACK AS A HAPPIER BEING, IF IT REALLY COULD BE A POSSIBILITY. MY ONLY HOPE IS KNOWING THAT ONE DAY MY LIFE WILL COME TO AN END, WHETHER IT’S ME WHO MAKES IT HAPPEN, OR ANY OTHER THING.
